Thursday, March 7, 2013

Can't Go Back

This past year we have been sitting on the edge...waiting for "a word from The Lord" as my husband would put it. While waiting, we have been obedient to keep moving forward as opportunities have come up. This obedience has certainly stretched us.  We have learned to serve in ways that are clearly beyond our " normal". Street missions and cross cultural Bible studies have proven that anything good that has happened in service was because" this all surpassing power is from God" and not us. It feels like we have stepped in the twilight zone- someplace where we feel completely out of our element and always uncomfortable. Going to the Dominican Republic to serve God made us feel even worse.  More angst. More restlessness. Even less sure of where God was calling us now. Does God create a hole in your heart so you will look to Him to fill it? Most of us would say Yes He does!
     Some of my radical Jesus loving friends laugh because they know God has been pressing this burning question into our hearts for some time now... Maybe the Lord would have us love more children on His behalf? Maybe we should seriously pursue Foster Care?   We have the space. We are not horrible parents....(no feedback right now please).   We feel confident in saying our first 2 babies turned out pretty well. Our beautiful, successful and extremely loving daughters are a testimony to God's grace in our parenting. Our boys are certainly showing us God's faithfulness to never leave or forsake us. Every day we see evidence of His grace forming their hearts as we lay down our lives for them. We know through His constant care that He will not leave us alone to our own devices... He has proven Himself faithful to give us strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow !
     Why should we do foster care? It seems like we have enough drama around here without adding to the mix.  Why put everyone at risk?  Staring into the eyes of all the beautiful children we met in the DR could have made us feel despondent and sad.  Such poverty! Seems like such little hope for their future.  But if you looked closer  you could see something completely different in the kids that were being ministered to by the church in Hato de Yaque compared to the kids outside their program.  The Light was there.  The look of being loved and recognized and cared for in the soul.  Jesus was there.  And He reminded us that He is calling all of us out, right where we are, to live a risky life so more children in this world can have Life and Life to the fullest...So our neighbors can know real Love and real Hope that doesn't disappoint.  Calling us out to speak Hope and Truth and Love into someone's life so they can really know the Lover of their Soul . It seems to us, the more we know Jesus, the harder it is to keep Him to ourselves. After you have tasted and seen that the Lord is good, how do you go back?   It reminds us of the story in John 6 when Jesus asked the Twelve if they wanted to leave Him after a particularly hard teaching.  Peter said, " Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. And we believe you are the Holy One of God".  There is no where else to go but to follow Him.  Where ever that may lead. To the Praise of His Glorious Grace!